Dusting off Destiny
by Thelxinoe
Summary: It's the 1960s and Richard & Emily are dating. This is what I hope is called meaningful fluff. Hope you'll enjoy it. R&R and get a free glass of milk with each cookie! Rated T just to be on the save side.


**Disclaimer: **Characters: Not mine. Idea: Yup, all me.

**DUSTING OFF DESTINY **

It was a lovely spring day in Northampton. The sky was blue, birds were singing their songs, and a light breeze flowed through the sun-warmed leaves outside her open window, carrying the subtle scent of fresh grass and blossoming flowers with it. She sat on the bed, reading a book, happy that she did not have to study today. Her roommates were out of the flat and she finally had some time to herself. There was only one thing that could make this day even better.  
The phone rang and she had to smile while she closed her book and slid off the bed. The wooden floor was cool against the soles of her feet as she walked over to the small end table next to the front door of the apartment to pick up the phone.  
"Hello?" Tucking a strand of auburn hair behind her ear, she waited for the other person to say something. Taking the phone with her into the living room, she walked over to the table under the opened window, leaning against it to enjoy the warm breeze.  
"Would you like to go for a walk?"  
She recognized the deep voice immediately and smiled. "Sure." Looking out of the window, she gazed up at the cloudless blue sky.  
His grin was audible. "Great. I'll be right over." He waited for her to confirm it in some way.  
Quickly doing the math, she knew that it would take him at least thirty minutes to get to her and nodded. "Alright, I'll see you then."

Greeting her at the door as she stepped out of the building, he took in her appearance, once again marveling at how elegant she could look in the simplest clothes. The red of her ballerinas matched the one of the cinch belt that accented the tight bodice of her white dress perfectly.  
Smiling at him, she slid off her short, red glove to shake his hand. "You broke the speed limit."  
"Only once." He grinned, mentally adding 'for the whole time of the ride.'  
The amused sparkle in her eyes told him that she knew what he was thinking. Motioning to his car, he smiled. "Shall we?"  
She nodded and walked past him.  
When he opened the door to the passenger seat for her, she looked up at him. "Where are we going?"  
Richard bent his head, tempted to kiss her but knowing she would not let him. Instead he gently took her hand and squeezed it lightly. "You'll see."

She did see.  
It turned out that he had planned this afternoon.  
They had just had coffee in a small café and now were walking through Hartford, talking about everything and nothing.  
It felt nice to walk like this and since none of their friends were likely to cross their way they could walk a little closer than usual. Crossing the street, Emily suddenly remembered something. "You know, my Grandmother lived only five minutes from here."  
"Did she?" Richard raised his eyebrows, smiling. "Well, she certainly had very good taste."  
She nodded. "Yes, it is a lovely neighborhood." Looking around, she let her gaze wander over the neatly trimmed hedges and perfect English lawns in the front yards of the impressive houses they were passing. Suddenly feeling him taking her hand, she first looked at it, then up at him.  
He smiled warmly, kissing her gloved hand before placing it in the crook of his arm, his hand still covering hers. Guiding her towards a small park, he led her over to a bench.

"It's lovely here." Emily gracefully sat down, taking off her gloves, making a mental note to not put them on again when they would continue their walk.  
Sitting down next to her, he watched her taking in their surroundings. "Yes, it is."  
"I think I actually remember this park." She looked up at the tree they were sitting under. The soft green of the new leaves was illuminated by the warm afternoon sun, a soft breeze letting them sway gently. Closing her eyes for a moment, she inhaled the sweet smell of the flowers growing around them.  
Richard watched the wind blowing a strand of hair in her face and leaned forward to tuck it behind her ear. Seeing her turn her head in his direction, her eyes widened slightly, he suddenly realized what he had done and looked down for a moment before he met her eyes again.  
She smiled; she had not imagined he'd do such a thing. Emily was fascinated about how nice it had actually felt. Such a small gesture and still there were butterflies in her stomach. "Thank you." It was the only thing she could think of to say.  
Glad about her reaction, he felt his heartbeat getting somewhat back to normal. He had not thought about it before he had acted. It had felt like the most natural thing to do. Strange. But in a nice way. A very nice way. Richard had to smile. They had agreed not to show affection in public, but they were miles away from Yale or Smith. Nobody knew they were here. So why not just act on impulse? He most certainly would do it again.  
Emily finally broke their eye contact and looked at her hand, absently beginning to play with her glove to keep herself from just bending forward and kissing him.  
"So you remember this park?" His voice was gentle. He tried to resist the urge to touch her again.  
Looking back at him she nodded. "Yes." When his eyes did not leave hers, she decided to go ahead. "Or at least I think I remember. My grandmother died when I was very young. But I have some faint memories of her." She looked away, smiling to herself. "It's strange. I see something or smell something and suddenly I have images in my head. Memories. Just very short scenes. Sometimes I don't even know whether I just thought them up or if they're real." Rolling her eyes, she gave him an apologetic look. "This sounds incredibly silly, doesn't it?"  
He smiled and shook his head. "No, it doesn't." Resting his arm on the backrest of the bench, his smile widened when she leaned a bit closer. "What kind of memory do you have of this park?" He didn't know if he wanted to reassure her by asking or if he just wanted to hear her voice again but either way, he succeeded.  
"You will call me crazy." She shook her head and smiled.  
He took her hand, waiting for her to look at him. "I promise I won't."  
Emily looked down at her hand in his and felt butterflies dancing in her chest. Chewing on her lower lip, she hesitated for a moment, but when she saw the look in his eyes, she knew he meant it. Hoping he would not let go of her hand, she didn't dare move her body in any way and just turned her head to the side. "Would you believe me if I told you that I think I remember being carried around here on my grandmother's arm?"  
He caught her eyes and nodded. "I would. It's fascinating. The things we remember. For instance, I remember very vividly that my grandfather had me on his knee and told me stories about his own childhood, but I can't remember the faces of any of the other kids in Sunday school."  
Giggling, she smiled at him in relief. "I know what you mean." She felt him moving a little closer, her upper arm touching the side of his chest.

"Do you remember where your grandmother's house was?"  
She looked up at him. His face was close to hers and a hundred memories danced around in her mind but none of them included her grandmother. Looking away, she tried to concentrate and thought it over but shook her head after a moment. "No. But I am sure that I would recognize it if I saw it."  
Feeling her leaning into him just a little more, he let his arm slide off the backrest and further around her shoulders. "How old were you when she..."  
"Passed away?" She finished his sentence when he trailed off. It felt so comfortable sitting like this.  
Richard nodded. "Yes."  
Her gaze fixed on some spot in the distance; she closed her eyes when he gently brushed his lips across her temple. "I think I was two. Maybe two and a half." Turning her head towards him, she looked up.  
Another nod and a raised brow. "She must have been a very impressive person if you still remember her."  
Smiling at him, she sat up a little straighter. As nice as it was in his arms, she could not shake off the feeling that they might get seen by someone. If not by one of Richard's or her friends then maybe one of her parent's friends, which would be worse.  
"According to my mother, she was perfect. There is a very impressive portrait of her in the hall. She is said to have been picture perfect. The perfect role model." Rolling her eyes, she huffed. "Mother sometimes scolds me for not being more like her." Emily bit her lip for saying this, glad when she saw Richard smile. He didn't mind her being like this. Un-ladylike.  
All of her life she had been told that she had to tame her temper, think before she spoke, behave like a lady. She had tried hard and never had succeeded. At least not 24/7 and her mother had not let her hear the end of it. Now here she sat, talking about her mother in a way nobody outside her family should hear her do. She actually felt understood by him. He did not judge her; he would not hold it against her.  
"She is wrong," he said softly, looking deep into her eyes.  
Emily had to look away, smiling at his compliment. It was not that she was not used to compliments, but coming from him, she knew they were not merely words.  
Trying to find a different topic, she looked down at where he gently brushed his thumb over the back of her hand.  
"What do you say..." He waited for her to look at him before he continued. "Shall we try to find your grandmother's house?"  
Emily giggled. "Are you serious?"  
"Dead serious," he winked.  
"Well, alright. Let's try to find it." She nodded and let him help her up. To her surprise, he wrapped his arm around her shoulders; to his surprise she let him.

Walking in silence for a while, Richard felt her sneaking her arm around him. Trying to find a way to keep himself from grinning in circles, he spelled out the first thing that came to his mind. "If your grandmother lived around here, how is it your family ended up in Waterbury?"  
Shrugging her slim shoulders, she looked down the road while she spoke. "My father."  
He sensed that she did not want to go into more detail and remained quiet. Her father; a sore topic he had tried to get into once. It had been enough to find out that she would, as she had put it in the angry fit she had talked herself into, 'rather have her guts removed with a spoon' than to talk about him again. As far as he knew he might be a very reputable business man on the outside but had been somewhat of a tyrant before he had chosen to simply ignore his daughters.  
He felt sorry for her. His father had been a great man and his mother was the strongest, most wonderful woman he had ever known. Maybe except for Emily.  
Looking down, he studied her face. She was someone special. More special than any other girl he had dated; closer to his heart than even Pennilyn had been.  
"Emily?"  
She looked up at him. "Yes?"  
Gazing in her expectant face, he suddenly made up his mind. "Come with me." He turned onto the next street, quickening his steps.  
Emily felt herself being pulled with him, not certain whether or not she liked it. "What? ... Why?" She furrowed her brow, pulling her hand out of his, stopping in the middle of the street.  
Turning back towards her, he extended his hand again. "I want to show you something."  
She squinted her eyes, taking a step backwards. "I've heard that before."  
Richard rolled his eyes, irritated by her behavior. "Just trust me on this, Emily."  
His pleading eyes made her reconsider her actions. Slowly putting her hand in his, she nodded. "Alright." Receiving a beaming smile.

Richard got more nervous the closer they came to the place he wanted to show her.  
Would she like it? What if she didn't?  
He had not been here in quite some time. Not since he had shown it to Pennilyn. He remembered her reaction, silently praying that Emily would react differently.  
She was the closest thing to perfect that he would ever come across, even with all her flaws. He did not know for sure but part of him made him believe that he loved her even more for her flaws than for her perfection.  
Emily on the other hand got more and more suspicious during their walk. What on earth could make him behave like he did? She caught herself thinking that she just hoped he did not want to introduce her to _his_ grandmother. Smiling at her own silliness, she let him lead her, not once complaining about the pace or the fact that as pretty as her shoes might look they would not allow her to keep up with him for much longer.

Slowing down when he came closer, he smiled at the sight of the iron entry port, the dark stone walls covered in ivy.  
She felt the change in his pace and adapted it, somewhat glad about it.  
Looking up, she furrowed her brow at the dark, crumbly facade of the mansion in front of which they came to stop. Emily cocked her head to one side, trying to take in the huge building.  
She suddenly found herself wondering what person would be stupid enough to keep a house in such a bad shape. With a few modifications it could be a beautiful house, but like this? Nobody would be blind enough to buy something so shabby-looking. At least not in this neighborhood. Why none of the neighbors had filed a complaint was over her head. Feeling his eyes on her, she caught his expectant gaze.  
"So?" He was a little uncertain; her face was unreadable.  
She raised one eyebrow. "What?"  
Seeing him motioning towards the house, she furrowed her brow in confusion. "A house?" She was even more confused when he nodded. "You wanted to show me a house?"  
"Yes," he stated matter-of-factly and suddenly felt a bit silly.  
Still confused, she looked from him to the house and back again. "Alright…?"  
This certainly was not the reaction he had hoped for, but maybe she would like it more if he just showed her the inside. Taking her hand, he stepped towards the mansion. "Come."  
She did not move. "Richard, we can't just walk in there."  
Grinning at the look on her face, he pulled at her hand again. "Yes, we can."  
She remained unmoving, her dark eyes sparkling in sneaking suspicion as she shook her head. "It's against the law."  
"No it's not," he answered, his voice a trace too grumpy for her taste.  
Pulling her hand out of his, she crossed her arms over her chest, glaring at him. "Yes, it is."  
Richard turned towards her, stepped closer and gazed deep into her eyes. "Trust me."  
"But-"  
"-I said trust me."  
The intensity of his gaze mesmerized her. Still not feeling completely okay with the situation she decided to do what he asked. Huffing in defeat, she let him lead her to the main entrance of the lot.

"See? It's locked." She gestured towards the door after he had tried to open it.  
The way he looked at her, she realized that he seemed to have something up his sleeve.  
He turned around, pulling a loose stone out of the wall, reaching into the hole. A triumphant grin formed on his face as he held up a rusty key to her. "All of these buildings have a spare key somewhere."  
Cocking her head to one side, she got even more suspicious. "And how did you know where exactly to search for it?"  
"Lucky streak?" He tried to sound as innocent as possible but knew she did not buy it. Deciding to ignore the guilty feeling for the moment, he turned towards the door and unlocked it, pushing it open.  
"Go ahead." He gestured for her to enter, bowing his head slightly.  
Brushing past him, she walked into the foyer, making a mental note to try to find out why he knew about the key sometime later.  
He watched her stopping in the middle of the foyer, looking around. "So… what do you think?"  
Feeling him coming up behind her, she turned her head towards him when he appeared next to her. "I think this is insane."  
Richard sighed, this was harder than he had imagined. "And apart from that?"  
She let he gaze wander around the interior for a moment, then shrugged. "Well it's … dusty."  
Bowing his head he tried to stay patient. "And?"  
"Old?"  
"And?" Maybe it had not been a good idea to bring her here at all. He should have waited for a better occasion. He should have planned this better, not act on impulse, just because they were in the neighborhood.  
Rolling her eyes, she sighed, her shoulders slumped, and looked at him. "Richard, what do you want me to tell you?"  
He shrugged, trying to look unimpressed. "Just tell me what you think!"  
"What does it matter?" She could not see his point.  
"Maybe it matters to me," he answered honestly.

Holding his gaze, she wondered what he was up to.  
Taking a deep breath, she slowly exhaled through her nose and began to walk around. Crossing a room she supposed had been the den, she tried to hide her dislike about the dust-covered floor and the spider webs everywhere.  
There were some pieces of furniture in the room; all covered with what could have once been _white_ sheets.  
Entering a larger room that was almost empty except for some ridiculous colored carpets and a monstrous couch, she turned around to look back at where Richard stood in the doorway. "This is the living room?"  
He shrugged his broad shoulders. "I don't know. Do you think it should be?" He watched her taking another look around.  
"No, I think this should be a dining room."  
Richard crossed his arms over his chest and leaned on the doorframe, looking at the floor to hide his smile from her. What she had said was exactly what he had thought when he had first been to this house. Emily was already through the next door, or at least the frame since the door was missing.  
He heard her calling from the other room. "Especially since this is the kitchen." She emerged through the doorway again, shaking her head in disbelief. "Who on earth made this room a living room?"  
Richard grinned openly at her. "I have no clue." Walking over to where she was standing, he gestured towards another door. "Go ahead." He couldn't wait for her next comments.

"_This_ should be the living room." Even with all the dirt it was an impressive room. Walking towards the picture windows, she furrowed her brow. "I wonder what's behind these incredibly dirty windows."  
She did not even notice Richard's amusement about her sudden enthusiasm about the house. He took a handkerchief out of his pocket and walked over to stand next to her. "Let's find out." Cleaning part of the window, he stepped aside to let her look through it.  
Gasping in surprise, it took a moment for her to say something. "Oh my..."  
Richard chuckled lowly. "Is that good or bad?"  
She blushed slightly, quickly deciding to brush it off. She should not let him see how perfect she thought this house turned out to be. "Well, it depends."  
Raising his eyebrow, he tried to keep his delight out of his voice. "On what?"  
"The flowers are lovely, but they'd have to go." She took another look out of the window, lifting herself up on her toes to get a better look. "I'm sure there is a beautiful patio underneath all this."  
Richard smiled knowingly. She was right, but he would not dare tell her that.  
"Want to go upstairs?"  
Turning towards him, she teased, "Has this line worked on _any_ woman you've brought here?"  
He put his hands behind his back, smiling down at her. "I have never brought anyone here, so I wouldn't know."  
"Never?" She couldn't help the smile that tucked on the corners of her lips.  
"Never." He hoped she would not see that he was lying. He had been here with Pennilyn, but he would rather die than to tell Emily that. Pennilyn. He had not thought about her for quite some time now. Part of him was strangely embarrassed by that fact. He watched Emily closely as she looked around, remembering how Pennilyn had looked at the house, hating every inch of it and telling him so, in her subtle way. He knew that if Emily didn't like it, she would have said it to his face. She possessed this wonderful bluntness when it came to these things.

Walking towards the staircase, she stopped in front of it, looking up then back at him. "What is upstairs?"  
"Oh, nothing much, I guess..." He strolled over to where she was standing. "Guest rooms, another one or two bathrooms, a few unused rooms..."  
She cocked her head to the side. So he _did_ know this house. She should definitely try to find out more later. For now, she would play his game. "And?"  
"And what?" He asked innocently.  
Emily smiled. "I think there is at least one room missing on your list and I wonder why you left it out."  
"Well, maybe I didn't want to offend you," he grinned mischievously.  
Mirroring his position, she teased back, "That never has stopped you before."  
He took another step closer, hovering over her. "I like you too much than to do it right here and now."  
Leaning her head back, she smiled up at him. "Why thank you. I feel special."  
"You should."  
They were standing so close, their chests were almost touching. Neither of them wanted to be the first to look away.  
She felt time stopping for a moment, a pleasant shiver running down her spine at the way he looked at her. Feeling her heart pound in her chest, a voice in the back of her mind kept her from leaning in and kissing him. Trying to find something that would get her out of this situation before she could act on her impulses, she turned away, searching the room. "Oh look!" Pulling away an off-white sheet that had been flung over a piece of furniture standing in the dark corner by the staircase, she smiled. Emily let her hand glide over the dark wood of the antique desk. "This is beautiful. I think it might actually be the only piece I'd allow to stay."

Richard snapped out of the trance he had been put in by the look in her eyes, walked over to her, standing behind her. "And whose would it be?"  
"Mine, of course," she stated. Still looking at the desk, she didn't see the broad smile her next statement brought to his face. "You'd have a study." Emily suddenly felt him sliding his arms around her waist, kissing the side of her neck.  
His lips close to her ear, he whispered. "I'd like that." Richard was glad when he felt her leaning back against him.  
She let herself relax in his embrace for a moment, closing her eyes, taking a deep breath. Feeling him kissing the side of her head, brushing his nose through her hair she wished they could stay like this forever and still at the same time she knew she couldn't. Turning in his embrace, she looked at him. "Would you?"  
Richard smiled at her, tightening his arms around her a bit. "Very much."  
Placing her hands against his chest, she returned his smile. "Well, you would have to buy this house before I could redecorate it."  
He grinned boyishly. "Would you want me to buy it?"  
"Are you serious?" Raising one eyebrow, she shook her head in disbelief.  
Nodding, his smile grew even wider. "I'm dead serious."  
Cocking her head to the side, her eyes sparkled with amusement. "We are not even engaged yet and still you want to buy us a house already?"  
He couldn't tell her it already was his. He had wanted this house the second he had seen it. Even before he had taken Pennilyn here. It was perfect and what made it even more perfect was that Emily felt the same about it. Brushing his hand over her cheek, he looked her deep in the eyes and bent forward, kissing her gently.  
Part of her wanted to just stay in his arms and let him do whatever he wanted, but she knew she couldn't. Reluctantly pushing him away, her hands remained against his chest to keep him from coming closer again. "Stop it." She smiled. How glad he was she did. This time she had not gotten mad at him for kissing her. He knew he shouldn't try again any time soon to make sure they'd stay on good terms, but it was hard.  
Emily felt him taking a small step back and winked. "I think I'll not go upstairs with you."  
Looking down, smiling, he shrugged his shoulders, then gazed into her eyes. "Well, I deserved that. But maybe you could show me my study?"  
She giggled. "Let me see if I can find it." Looking around, she saw another door and walked towards it.

There was a built-in bookcase in one of the walls. The color of the room was awful and there was a ridiculous plush carpet in it. Walking over to the bookcase, she inspected it. Dark wood. Maybe mahogany. It was difficult to tell. Some of the windows were boarded up, some cracked. There just was not enough light in the room. Emily turned around, leaning her head back to look at the ceiling before she fixed her gaze on Richard's expectant face. "This would be it."  
"Because of the bookcase?"  
"Because of the location."  
Better answer, he thought. And exactly right again. "So, where would you put my desk?"  
He watched her turn around again.  
Walking towards the windows on the other end of the room, she stopped a few feet away from it and turned back towards him. "About here," she answered, pointing towards a spot on the floor she thought was appropriate. "There would be a bookcase behind it, below the window, so the desk might end up a little further towards the middle of the room, but I think about here." Looking up, she saw him grinning broadly, suddenly feeling incredibly silly.  
He watched her look away, the change in her mood for once visible to him. Quickly walking towards her, he stood beside her and looked around. "Yes, I think that would be perfect." He turned and looked at the floor below the window. "So, a bookcase?" He drew a line in the dust with the tip of his shoe. "Till here?"  
"Yes, or a little larger." She watched on as he drew a new line and nodded in approval. "It should be as wide as the window." Playing along, she was amazed at how much fun this was.  
Richard nodded, drawing a square under the window. "And my desk will be...?"  
Pointing towards the floor, she looked as he put the tip of his foot down once again. "Yes, about there." He drew another square into the dust.  
Emily nodded in approval when their eyes met and had to smile at his lop-sided grin.  
"What else will be in here?"  
Strolling around the room, she shrugged her shoulders. "Well, lots of files, I guess."  
He looked down to hide his smile, even though she was facing away from him, before he put his hands behind his back and followed her. "Nothing else?"  
Emily turned towards him again. "Well, what else would you want?"  
"What else is there in a study?"  
She thought for a moment. "You might want to get a couch."  
Richard nodded. "Do you think I should?"  
"Shouldn't you let your wife decide that?" she teased.  
"I thought I was."  
For a second she was confused, then decided to laugh it of, heading for the door.

Following her, he pretended to pout. "Hey, it's not nice to laugh about your husband-to-be."  
"What makes you think I'll marry you?" She turned to face him.  
"The fact that you love me?"  
Her eyes momentarily widened in shock. "Who said that?"  
"Nobody said that; I just know." He was somewhat irritated by the angry sparkle in her eyes.  
Trying to look unimpressed, she tilted her head back a little, raising her eyebrows. "And how can you be so sure?"  
"Because I want to believe that..." He stopped. When he looked into her expectant eyes, he said what he had tried to tell her over and over again. This time he would not butt out. "That you feel the same for me as I feel for you."  
She felt her blood rushing from her face, a sudden cold and hot shiver running through her system. She was sure that her heart had stopped for a moment. Realizing that she had forgotten to breath, she inhaled deeply, trying to play it cool but at the same time knowing that he could read the surprise in her eyes. Looking away, she took a step back, trying to get herself back under control. "I..." she trailed off.  
This was not the reaction he had hoped for. Or was it? Well, she was speechless, that was a first. Walking towards her, he gently grabbed her upper arms, waiting for her to look him in the eyes, before he spoke quietly. "I love you, Emily Harrison."  
She didn't trust her voice enough to speak, instead she did something that was completely against her upbringing; she would show him what she felt instead of saying it. Lifting herself up on her toes, she steadied herself by putting her hands against his chest before she kissed him deeply.

It was better than hearing her say anything, even though he still wanted to hear her say the words. For now all he could do was wrap his arms tightly around her and return her kiss.  
Her hands snuck up his chest and around his neck, holding him close while their tongues dances with each other. Emily didn't care where they were or that she should not behave like this. She ignored the voice of her mother that kept scolding her for what she did. She just wanted to make him understand. She needed to.  
They didn't break away for a long time, their mouths pressed against each others as if their life deepened on it, as if they would die if they'd pull away.  
His hands brushed up and down her back, the soft material of her dress letting him feel her underwear through it. He had gotten so much but still wanted more.  
She didn't stop him when his hands glided lower, her hands entangled in his hair while their kiss became more passionate. Why did it feel so right? It shouldn't. But he loved her. He had said so and she knew he meant it. His hands squeezed her behind, pulling her closer towards him. There was a tingle soaring through her, budding somewhere in her belly, spreading from there right to the tips of her toes and fingers. Concentrating on the feeling, she suddenly heard herself moan. The intensity of the moment frightened her. Turning her head, she felt Richard kissing her cheek, then a spot below her ear. Shivering, she tried to force her eyes open. "No," she whispered breathlessly.  
Richard heard her but his mind was too focused on her closeness. The way she smelled, the way her skin tasted, the way it felt. He got back to reality when he realized she was trying to push him away, her body stiff. She was afraid. Why was she afraid? He had to stop. Finally getting back under control, he watched her taking a step back.

They stared at each other, trying to catch their breaths.  
"Emily…" He reached out but she took a step back, raising her hands in defense.  
"No." She shook her head, her eyes showing the rollercoaster of emotions she was going through. She was afraid. Not only of him not letting go of her but more of how good it had felt to kiss him like that. To be kissed by him, touched … She shook her head again, her eyes locked with his.  
"Emily, please." Richard made a small step forward, not wanting to scare her. He held his hands out to her, palms up, moving slowly. "I am sorry."  
She tightened her arms around herself, looking away.  
Stepping closer, he saw the angry tears in her eyes. He had thought it would be harder to calm down but the second he had seen the panic in her eyes, his concern for her had killed any kind of passion that might have been left in his system from before she had pushed him away.  
Emily was mad at herself. To let him see her like this was inexcusable. Not five minutes ago she had been in heaven, now there only was this mixture of guilt, anger and confusion left. How she wished she could at least _seem_ okay on the outside. But no; he had seen it. She felt him hesitantly touching her upper arms and looked up to meet his gaze. Was there sympathy in them? She didn't know. Clenching her teeth together, she forced herself to stand his gaze, even more confused when he smiled apologetically before gently pulling her closer.

Taking a deep, shuddering breath, she rested her cheek against his chest, letting him hug her. To her own surprise she felt herself calming down. Closing her eyes, she heard him whisper, "I'm sorry." His chin grazed her hair before she felt him kissing the top of her head. It made her smile.  
Looking up, she felt strangely warm... loved? Maybe that was what she felt. She liked the feeling. Smiling, she watched his face light up in relief. "You should be." She tried to sound playful.  
Richard chuckled. "Well, to be honest, only part of me is."  
She knew that she should feel fear at his words, but she didn't. Instead she had to giggle. "And which part would that be?" There it was again, the same ease that always was between them when they talked to each other while alone.  
"The part that never wants to scare you." He brought his hand up, brushing a strand of hair out of her face.  
She closed her eyes for a moment. "Is that a big part?"  
Chuckling lowly, he nodded.  
"You know," she looked down at where her hands rested against his chest then smiled up at him, "I would kiss you again." Cocking her head to the side her eyes sparkled with mischief. "But part of me doesn't think that's a good idea."  
Deciding to play her game, he entwined his fingers behind her back. "And which part would that be?"  
"The part that was taught to be a lady."  
"Is that a big part?"  
She slapped his chest, sharing his light laughter. "Oh you."

They shared a moment of comfortable silence, their gazes locked before Emily pushed away from him and walked towards the bookshelf. Brushing her fingertip over the dark wood, she watched it leaving traces in the dust. "Richard?"  
"Yes?" He walked over slowly.  
"Did you mean what you said?" She turned her head in his direction, her eyes still gazing at the bookshelf she had drawn on. "About marrying me, I mean."  
"I am not supposed to tell you that." He leaned against the wall next to her, studying her features. "It would ruin the surprise."  
Emily turned towards him. "Surprise?"  
Grinning, he nodded, leaving her in the dark about what he meant.  
"If you say so." She shrugged her shoulders and added something to her dust drawing, making sure he would see it before she turned to leave the room.  
Looking down at the dark surface, he grinned as he saw what she had made. 'E.H. R.G.' was carved out of the grey veil that had covered the wood, surrounded by a heart shape.  
"It is not even finished yet and I already can not get you out of your study?" she called from the hall.  
Quickly walking after her, he could not wipe the grin off his face.

* * *

**Authors note: **Hi my favorite reader. Yes, I mean YOU, who reviewed my other stuff. Thank you SO MUCH! I would send you flowers, but I don't know where you live. ;o)  
So I wrote a little more. Okay, let's face it; it's a LOT more! 

And I got my wonderful friend to beta. Some of you know her; she goes by the UserID UnaVitaSegreta here on ffDOTnet. If you haven't yet, go and check out her stories! She's a genius:oD Thanks again for your help!  
I also want to thank OldFashionedGrl who came up with this incredibly fitting title. You are a goddess when it comes to finding titles! No way I'll take that back!!


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